This week marks the first anniversary of Tyler's diagnosis. It seems hard to fathom that just last year, my heart was shattered. The realities of life seemed to sneak up on all of us, and damaged our ignorance towards the attrocities of illness. I pass the Children's Hospital at least once a week, and I secretly say a prayer in thanks of Tyler's health. Today, when I passed it, I vividly remembered how I felt one year ago on the 13th. I remember visiting Tyler the first day he was admitted to the hospital. I attempted to keep a brave face when I saw him for the first time. Unfortunately, I cannot honestly say that I contained my emotions, and I specifically recall his frail little body curled in a ball on his hospital bed, his colour and his boyish energy drained completely. I remember the fear and agony I felt seeing him there and realizing how close we were to losing him and the powerlessness that we all felt in this whole situation.
I realize that we do not, in any way, have any control over what our future brings. I can however be extremely thankful for Tyler's health. I am thankful for all the technology and machines that have aided in diagnosing and battling Tyler's cancer. I am thankful for each and every employee of the Children's Hospital who may have simply placed a smile on his face, and that of Darla and Mark. I am thankful to the parents, children and employees of St. Lawrence Elementary School who helped in any capacity that they could to make the Wallis' life a bit easier, or who simply asked how we were doing. I am especially thankful to all those who prayed for healing for our little man.
In sharing our memories of this past year with my family, I realized that although it has only been a year, all this seems like so long ago. When we were in the thick of it, it seemed to last an eternity. Now that things have settled a bit, it seems as though things took place ages ago. When I pick up my son from the Wallis' house everyday, I am usually greeted by Tyler at the door. Before he became ill, Tyler and Bethany used to greet us at the door by running down the hall screaming. I can remember yearning to hear Tyler's laugh and squeals. I now take a moment everyday to appreciate this, and many other finer things that I might have taken for granted. Please continue to pray for his healing.
I simply cannot put into words my feelings or express myself accurately about the events that unfolded as I wrote my last blog entry. Our dear son, cousin, nephew, brother, grandson, buddy, Aden, died suddenly on Sunday night. As this is such a shock to us all, I can honestly say that I have not yet come to terms with my great loss. My love for my sisters' children is as great as the love I feel for my own.
